New Mama Tips and Tidbits

I'm a mama! Again! Elias Raymond Lewis Hardy was born Thursday, August 26th at 12:46am weighing 9lbs 6oz and was 21 inches long. Being a mama is the greatest privilage I could have and also the most challenging job I can imagine.

Elias Raymond Lewis, born August 26th, 2010:

I've been thinking about what I went through after Rowan was born and how it's all coming back to me. AHHH!

Rowan Christopher Liam, born December 7th, 2008:


This post is about the first few weeks after giving birth, some particular 'challenges' I and others have faced, and how to cope. I sure wish I had known some of this the first time around and now that some of these things are coming up again, I thought I'd share the awkward and ooey gooey details and maybe help someone who'll be a mama soon.

Guts: The first few days are definitely the hardest as you've just had a large tumor removed from your gut and now all your organs must relocate to their original placement. Right after birth, I couldn't breathe well when standing because all of a sudden I had so much room in my gut- what a weird feeling of empty! Don't worry, after 2-3 days or so, everything settles back to normal.

The Undercarriage: I use this term to include it all: vagina, perrineum, anus. Yuck. This is the worst part, by far. After one has had a human being extracted, one way or another, from her body, she can hardly expect to just be back to normal. hahahahahahahaha!!! Pretty much, you'll never be the same again. But, don't be discouraged, it's not ALL bad. ;) For a few days, there's bound to be quite a bit of swelling and discomfort, which can be helped with ice packs, sitz bath, and various sprays. The hospital gives out a numbing spray which I was passed along to me by a friend. I found it burned in a chemical sort of way. Maybe I was especially sensitive to it, as my friend swore it was the best stuff. I prefer the New Mama Bottom Spray (yes, that's the name of it) made by Earth Mama, Angel Baby. It's all natural, herbal, and has a mild cucumber scent. It is useful to aid in the healing of the perrineum and to help with hemorhoids.

Speaking of hemorhoids, I always thought they were an old man desease, and eew, don't even go down the aisle that carries Preperation H! Well, they're also the desease of the newly un-pregnant. *sigh* Some people are lucky enough to escape this icky, but most of us will probably get them. Even if you have a C-Section you might get them after the birth because they're caused, not only by excessive pushing or constipation, but by the constant pressure that is a baby's head in the last months of pregnancy.

Bummer- litterally.

Some people get them as they're giving birth, some get them after just because, or with their first poop, and some escape. I hate those people. If the hemorhoids are really bad, you might want to sit on a donut. Not a real donut, silly! A round pillow with a hole in the middle made just for this purpose. Or a Boppy pillow. Otherwise, you might use the above-mentioned spray or Tuck's pads to help.

The first poop....might hurt. Or it might not. I have had one first poop that didn't hurt at all and one that did- because it was freaking ginormous! Maybe my body was constipating itself in anticipation, I don't know. So, eat plenty of fiber after you give birth and/or use stool softeners. But, the first poop did not hurt the perrineum like I expected. It was just another anus issue.

Perrineum: If you're lucky, you won't tear or get an episiotomy when giving birth. If you're not lucky, you'll have to deal with the stitches and healing time.

Vagina: It'll be all stretched out. And swollen. Just don't look at it for awhile to avoid the trauma. And start Kegals again as soon as you feel up to it. Btw, that squeeze bottle that you get after birth will be your best friend for a few weeks. Heaven knows you don't want to WIPE down there! Keep it filled with warm water or a healing herbal tea for use after you use the toilet.

Yeast infections: The vagina has a natural balance of yeast and bacteria keeping the yeast under control. You might get a yeast infection in your vagina after you've stopped bleeding. (Did you know you will bleed for up to 6 WEEKS after you give birth?? So much for getting a break from a period- your body will make up for lost time with this one) You will know you have yeast when the vajajay itches and burns-ick. What to do:

1. Eat yogurt with probiotic cultures. Check the container. Also, plain is best because sugar feeds infections.
2. Put plain yogurt up your hoohaw with a baster. Kinda messy but will help. :) Just rinse out after a while.
3. Make a douche of 1c warm water and 1T apple cider vinegar. Use this every time you go to the bathroom or whenever the itch becomes too much to bear. I put mine in the squeeze bottle. You don't have to douche, either. Just spray the affected area. This totally works to alleviate the itch while restoring the vagina balance.

Ok, on to some other cantankerous body parts....

Everyone knows 'breast is best,' and I certainly agree. I have chosen to nurse my boys and certainly don't regret it. But breastfeeding is not a walk in the park for awhile. Well, for some I think it is, but most of us nursing mamas experience some level of soreness for a couple of weeks. As I was learning to breastfeed, Rowan developed an improper latch and my nipples became cracked and painful- nursing was excruciating, to say the least.

The NIPPLE SHEILD= silicon's gift to the breastfeeding mama!

I used one just long enough for my nipples to heal and then they were calloused enough to nurse without pain. Just try not to use it so long that your baby becomes dependent on it. You can get one from the hospital fitted to you, with a prescription, or you can run down to Target and buy the one-size-fits-all. This is what I did, and it works just fine.

A proper latch is where baby's lips are splayed out around your nipple, with
nipple pushed far into his mouth (don't worry, he won't choke), baby's tongue is
under the nipple so he can massage the breast tissue to extract the milk, baby's
chin is pushing into the breast, and his nose is just resting on breast.
Baby should not be chewing ON the nipple or constantly latching on and
off. This causes friction where there should be none and will cause your
nipples to become increasingly sore.

Other remedys for nipple soreness include lanolin (I use Lansinoh brand in a purple tube) and soothies (a cooling breast pad), both found in the baby food/nursing section of the department store, and breast milk. Keep in mind that I was recently advised by a friend that using cream of any kind can breed bacteria for a yeast infection because cream keeps the nipple warm and moist. The best remedy for sad nipples is your own milk because breast milk is SOOO healing.

TIP: use breast milk in your baby's eyes if he gets goopy eyes- they will clear right up.

Clogged milk ducts can occur if nursing, maybe for no reason at all. In order to rid yourself of them, rub them from the base of your breast toward the nipple as hard as you can stand until they're gone- this worked for me. The clogged duct was painful enough that I rubbed all afternoon and it was gone by the next day. You can also adjust your nursing position so that baby's chin is toward the clogged duct. This way he is extracting the most milk from the affected area and so will unclog the duct. Hot shower or compress can also help relieve the clog.

Engorgement: many women experience this and it is basically from having so much milk that baby can't keep up. This usually happens soon after the milk comes in before your body can regulate. It is characterized by rock hard, painful-to-the-touch breasts. Pump the extra milk a tiny bit if baby cannot get a good latch. Don't pump much as milk is made on a supply-and-demand basis and if you pump too much you will just make more and more milk-ouch! Nurse as often as you can, take hot showers to help you relax so your milk will let down, place cold cabbage leaves on sore breasts. I haven't experienced this personally so maybe a reader who has could comment on the best ways to relieve engorgement.

Hopefully, that's enough tidbits on breastfeeding to get you started. :)

Sleeplessness. Oh, no one told you that you might not sleep much after baby is born?? oops! Yeah, babies eat in the middle of the night. And sometimes are nocturnal and have to be reconditioned. But, you will learn to survive on less sleep. That's all I have to say about this. Oh! Sleep when the baby sleeps for awhile. Take naps and such. And be greatful when your newborn sleeps 3 WHOLE HOURS in a ROW.

Where have the midwives gone?

Did you know that only 10% of laboring women in the US are attended by midwives? That compared with 70-80% in most other developed countries. And that midwife-attended births have comparably positive outcomes, when you look at the number of healthy mothers and babies, as births attended by OB-GYNs, and considerably better outcomes if you consider the much lower levels of unnecessary medical interventions (delivery by cesarean, forceps, or vacuum, episiotmy, use of drugs, etc)?

Besides that, I have NEVER heard anyone who delivered with a midwife say, "I sure wish I had gone to the hospital to have an epidural. My delivery experience was less than satisfactory." (and I know several midwife-delivered women personally) On the contrary, many women who deliver in hospital with an OB wish their labor would have had fewer interventions. Although that's not the way it is usually put. They might say, "I wish I could have moved around more during labor." (They couldn't because of the IV, used for hydration if they weren't allowed to eat and drink during labor, or the epidural drip, or the fetal monitors)

So, why is it that we now consider midwives to be outdated and home birth to be dangerous and primative? There is absolutely NO evidence to support this feeling.

FEAR. We no longer view our bodies as capable. We don't view the pain as useful and necessary. We think labor will be too hard and too long, excrutiating. We are convinced that something bad is going to happen (when, in fact, only about 2% of interventions become medically necessary and hardly ever emergent).

As a woman who has chosen to labor with midwives, I feel personally rebuffed and offended when someone asks me incredulously, "WHY??" (as though I am somehow harming myself and my baby for refusing to be brainwashed into the culturally accepted idea that the hospital is the only place to be to have a baby). Why not?! It is better, safer, and more comfortable laboring with a woman in attendance who knows me and the mechanics of birth intimately, who cares about my and my baby's well-being, and who does not feel it is necessary to poke and prod me every hour or to hook me up to a variety of machines to measure my progress which would restrict my mobility, comfort, and progression of labor.

Now, I am not saying that one shouldn't go to the hospital. Some women are more comfortable surrounded by doctors, nurses, med students, machines and monitors. To each their own. But perhaps the reality is that women are misinformed. Misinformed about the safety of home birth (or birth anywhere with a midwife). Misinformed about the real risks (or lack thereof) to their baby with each method of care. That is sad.

If women educated themselves on all their options, would not more chose a midwife-attended birth out of hospital? I think so.

For further information on your birthing options, statistics of labor and birth, medical interventions used (with good reason or not) during labor and delivery, and a broad look at obstetrics through the centuries, read:

'Ina May's Guide to Childbirth' by Ina May Gaskin, leading American midwife in practice for over 30 years. (In her practice, only 2 women out of 324 gave birth by cesarean, compared with the nearly 30% c-section delivery rate nation-wide).

'Stand and Deliver' by Emma Mahony. A funny, non-graffic, and informative look at all types of birth with positive outcomes.

'Pushed' by Jennifer Block. An eye-opening account of current labor and birth practices in the US.

...and watch 'The Business of Being Born.' Obstetrics today truly is a business.