The Large Family

I was talking with a friend who mentioned that once a family has 3 children, the number of social invitations dwindles to basically nil. Apparently, those who once invited this family over/out assume that the parents must now be so overwhelmed with their huge family that they won't be able to have a good time, or will be too exhausted to want to go out at all, or, more likely, the invitee simply can't handle the energy that comes with many children and so chooses not to invite. hmmm. Can this be the case?? Makes me think there's something wrong with the world if we do not value children enough to enjoy the chaos, handle the interruptions, and clean up the mess that they inevitable leave in their wake- or rather, to teach them to clean up after themselves.

As to the former excuse, it is true that having children takes a great deal of energy and that many parents are sleep deprived and might prefer to go to bed early than attend a social engagement. Why not let the parents decide for themselves? If the latter excuse rings true, however, maybe we all should stretch ourselves enough to include the little ones and enjoy the nuances of a get-together with small kids. I garuntee it will be interesting, might even be fun! After all, children are tomorrow's future, seems like they would benefit from learning how to conduct themselves in a social situation with adults.

I have noticed a significant decline of invitations since we had Rowan, and then Elias, but I suppose this just means we'll have to broaden our friend base to those who already have children and therefore appreciate the little ones and understand that those with kids still like to have a life! Since this phenominon of losing friends, I appreciate even more those who have continued to hang out with us, in spite of *gasp* our children.

I'm interested to see what the future holds for our friendships since we do hope to have (read:many) more children. I sure hope the general public doesn't shy away from families with many children like some kind of a disease (don't worry, it's not contagious), but in the event that this is so, I hope to have so much grace that when someone comments to me on my large family,"Are they all yours? God bless you!" I reply as per Clara Danielson, "He already has."

The Unwanted Child

I had a conversation recently about how children in some third world countries are not valued. They may even have parents, but because they were an "accident," they are basically left to fend for themselves in the street. I just don't get it. I can't believe that no matter how uneducated she is with regard to birth control practices, how poverty-stricken, how exhausted or underfed, a mothers' natural instinct to love and protect her child would not kick in. At least, I thought it was natural instinct. I can't imagine ignoring or not caring for my child...no matter how many I may have. And I don't think I could love my children any more.

When I was growing up my mom would cry during a scene from a movie when a child dies and I always laughed at her. No more. I do the same thing now that I know what she knows, feel what she feels. Even the thought of something bad happening to Rowan or Elias breaks my heart.

I guess I just feel so sad for those children who have no one to love them. Well, that's not true. Jesus loves them and is more heartbroken than I that one of his children isn't valued and cherished. I just hope all children everywhere will feel loved here on this earth by someone. It is heartbreaking that some may go to heaven before they know love.